Monday, April 04, 2005
the clown that is stalking me
i am afraid of clowns.if i went to a birthday party when i was young and a clown happened to be the entertainment, i would hide in another room while he did his show and refuse to even be within eyesight of the hideous creature.
at parades, when the clowns came by to throw candy to the children, i would turn around and cover my eyes until they were gone. the lure of candy could not even seduce me into having any sort of contact with those beasts.
i am in recovery.
once, in high school, i even hugged a clown at a parade and, in return for the hug, received a sticker that said "i hugged a clown today."
i even managed to walk passed that clown that drives the strange gargoyle car with the fountain on the back that you can see at saturday market sometimes. he was painting windows at nordstrom rack in clackamas and i really wanted those green flip-flops from old navy. so i did it. i walked straight passed him. but avoided eye contact.
but last week might have put me over the top again. a mystery clown showed up and i saw this same clown three times in one week! once, when walking down the street with a friend near wild oats in SE PDX near 28th and burnside, this clown drove by in a minivan painted in multi-colored metalic greens and purples. there was a picture of the clown on the van as well as a monkey dressed in a clown outfit. the clown was actually driving the van and holding a puppet-monkey-clown, waving it around and making freaky clown noises.
a few days later that same week i saw him again while i was shopping at the fred meyer on 148th and division (totally different area). his van was parked in the parking lot and while i was walking out of the store to my car, he was walking away from his van toward the store. i did the whole "get your keys ready before you actually get to the car in case someone is waiting to ambush you" thing and quickened my pace to the car.
and then breanna and i were having lunch a few days later at red robin in the mall 205 parking lot and i looked out the window of the restaraunt and saw the clown's van driving by! WTF!?!?!
i am officially freaked out.
say it don't spray it 8:58 AM
3 i heard that
